Sometimes ideas, words and blog stories are nowhere to be found and on other days, like this morning they are literally screaming in my head to get out. It feels like I have about 3 stories in here so I think I will need to spread them out a little and trust the timing of them in reaching you.
Our morning ritual is to watch TVNZ’s Breakfast. We really enjoy the aroha and comradery that Jenny-May, Indira, John and Matty have. They laugh, appreciate and are passionate about people and their mahi/work.
Once a month, Jenny-May interviews an amazing wahine from Australia – Jane Caro. I’ve actually just gone into The Nile and ordered her book “Accidental Feminist” which is a bit exciting. Jane is also on Facebook if you wish to follow her. Jane often brings up really interesting topics for discussion and this morning it was about how women are traditionally viewed as possessions. How is that for a confronting statement? If you are married … how many of you were given away by your toku papa/father or if you were a bit more modern – toku papa and toku mama/mother? I was honoured to have dad walk me down the aisle but I never thought about the deeper tradition behind this. Did dad own me if he could give me away?
Giving our daughter away?
It made me think about the day that our daughter “L” may one day choose to get married. Will we both “give her away” or will we have a chat with her about being proud to escort her down the aisle into this new phase of her life. She is her own wahine and everything about her is hers alone and to be proud of every single thing that this incorporates and envelops. We will always be there to tautoko/support her but she is not ours to give away.
After listening to Jane Caro speak, I always feel more in my own space as a wahine. I was going to say “strong” but in the interview on Breakfast with Jane the month before she discussed how traditionally strong woman were only seen in the circus as if they were a freak of nature. “Oh, you’re are strong wahine aren’t you?” It sounds condescending doesn’t it because when we speak out as wahine we have often been frowned upon.
Burn my bra
If my boobs weren’t so big, I’d be tearing my bra off right now and burning it. As wahine we have come a long way and I think deep down we all know that it’s still going to take a bit to get that pendulum swinging into balance. What step will you take today to get that momentum moving?